One thing children, young people (and some adults) often struggle with is recognising how their emotions affect them. Things like anxiety, stress and anger will often have physical signs that accompany them. One sign which is a recognised sign of anxiety for example is butterflies or a churning stomach. The way children may describe it is as a tummy ache. This can be a real concern for parents who do not know what is wrong with their child. In fact, I worked with a mother who had taken her eldest daughter for a whole barrage of tests for her stomach-ache only for her to require support with anxiety at a later stage.
If your child is regularly complaining of stomach pain, it is of course totally appropriate to visit your Dr to rule out physical causes such as constipation, urine infection, reflux etc, but if all avenues lead to a blank, is it possible they are suffering with anxiety? Perhaps something has changed in their lives which they are struggling to adjust to. Perhaps they have recently started school and are finding it hard to adjust. Perhaps something has happened at school which is bothering them?
When would I suspect that it is anxiety?
Some indicators that it could be anxiety:
- It happens at specific times of day or days of the week.
- Is happens when there is a big event coming up?
- Is it happening frequently?
- Has something changed which may be causing some anxiety?
What can I do to help?
Helping your child to be able to recognise how their emotions affect them physically will help them as they get older to know when they need to do something to help themselves. A simple way to start the process is to talk to them about the different emotions they feel, both positive and negative. Then get them to think about where they feel it in their body.
It is normal to feel some anxiety leading up to a test or an important event at school or college, over thinking things can sometimes cause it to get out of hand and there are simple ways to manage this including making sure they are eating, exercising and getting enough sleep. Also checking in on ourselves, and how we are feeling as our own emotional state can have an impact on our young people or the world around them can, for exemple during the pandemic my own daughter wouldn’t settle to bed one night when I was at work, and when her dad probed further, she was worried about how me getting covid at work because of the media hype.
If you are worried about your teen or want some support for yourself get in touch.