Over the years of working in schools I have worked with a number of young carers. Often they have come to me for something and I have then discovered their caring role. The Children’s Society estimate that there are 800,000 young carers in the UK between 5 and 17 years of age. They acknowledge that they may start even younger. They are often hard to identify and 1 in 3 will experience difficulties with their mental health. Being a young carer has an impact on a young person’s life in a number of ways. They may feel different to their peers and perhaps unable to share what is happening in their life. Often they are trying to juggle their caring role which can be quite intense with day to day life. When I have had the pleasure of working with them they are very resourceful, determined and capable young peiple.
What sort of struggles might they face?
The young person will often be anxious about their parent while they are not with them which might interfere with their ability to concentrate in school. They might avoid home when things are really tough, staying out late and possibly misusing drugs or alcohol. They may not look after themselves very well. School attendance may become a problem if the person they care for is acutely unwell. I have worked with some who have experienced quite a lot of trauma with their parent collapsing on them. Or perhaps their parent has spent time in hospital meaning they are separated from their family. Friendships may be difficult to sustain while they have added responsibility. Their role can be ongoing for a significant time in their lives. Unfortunately sometimes they will go on to lose the person they were caring for which is tricky on a number of levels.
How can counselling support young carers?
When I work with young people we will be looking at how they can beat meet their emotional needs while continuing in their role of a carer. This will be an ongoing stressor for them, but unlikely something that can be changed. In counselling they would have space to be heard which may not be available elsewhere. I will teach them some ways to relax when they feel overwhelmed. This will hopefully help to keep their levels of emotional arousal down, reducing the adrenaline and cortisol flooding their system.
We might look at how they can manage their day to day lives which might involve cooking, cleaning, looking after siblings and providing personal care as well as trying to study. Perhaps they may need some suggestions as to how to manage this load and organise their day. Friendships or emotional connection might be tricky at a time when friendships are an important part of their identity development, so this might be something we look at.
If the young person has lost a parent we may do some work around trauma, grief and remembering their parent before they became unwell. We would look if appropriate at how they can use the skills they have gained as a young carer to visualise their future.
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